There are some songs...

...that no matter how much you enjoy them, a white person can't walk around singing them out loud.

Meneeeer! and other tails

Kitty Stories:

1. Haley has a new hidey-hole somewhere, and so far Minion hasn't found it. But Fernando and I haven't either! I couldn't find her before I went to bed this morning (though when I woke up she was sleeping on my pillow, next to my head.)

2. Yesterday Minion was chasing a wasp--she put her hand down on it to capture it, and it stung her. Funny thing is, it just set her on a course of revenge. The wasp flew up to the overhead light, and she was jumping all over the place, trying to get at it. "Wasp! WASP! WAAAASP!!!!"  All the while occasionally licking her little stung paw.

3. These days I have to lock Minion up when she eats, so she won't take Haley's food. Minion gets a larger portion (growing toddler) so in the beginning Haley was finished her food before Minion, and it was safe. But now Minion eats a bite or two of her food, then RUNS over to Haley's dish and tries to suck it all up in record time. If you want to know what Haley sounds like when she's growling and eating at the same time, watch this video and listen to the tauntaun noises.


4. Kitty Song: Fernando and I tend to take whatever song is in our heads' and adapt it to the cats. Yesterday I was singing:

My cat bad!
My cat hood!
My cat does things that your cat never could!

Also, my old roommate and I used to adapt the Old Yeller theme to every animal we owned. (My dad taught it to us.) I need to compose Minion's.

Nombly's
Old Nombly was a mongrel
A little straight-eared mongrel
Fancy free, without a family tree
But he could up and do it
Just like there's nothing to it
And that's how a good cat should be.

Here Nombly! Come back Nombly
--meh! meh! meh!--
Beeeest doggone caaat in the Eaaast!

(He was saying "meh" before it was fashionable.)

Bantha's (the roommate's rottweiler)
Old Bantha was a purebred
A big old lop-eared purebread
Fancy free, but with a family tree
And he could up and do it
Just like there's nothing to it
And that's how a good dog should be.

Here Batha! Come back Bantha
--rowr! rowr! rowr! [deep gravelly voice]
Beeeest doggone dooog in the Eaaast!

Haley:
Young Haley was a calico
A little straight-eared calico
Fancy-free without a family tree
But she could up and do it
Just like there's nothing to it
And that's how a good kitty should be

Here Haley! Come back Haley
--hiss! hiss! hiss!--
Best doggone cat in the East.

Mum's dog Sassy:
Old Sassy was a mongrel
A little lop-eared mongrel
Fancy-free without a family tree
But she could up and do it
Just like there's nothing to it
And that's how a good dog should be

Here Sassy! Come back Sassy!
--Sassy! Come back! SASSY!! COME HERE!!--
Best doggone dog in the East

How's this?
Wee Minion was a calico
A little orphaned calico
Fancy-free without a family tree
But she could up and do it
Just like there's nothing to it
And that's how a good kitten should be

Here Minion! Come back Minion
-- meneer! meneer! meneer!-- [she has a teeny tiny whiny squeek]
Best doggone cat in the East

More of my day

I'm back. Usually when I get sick--straight to the throat, so now I've got that Bill-Cosby-tonsils-skit type of throat*, so I think it woke me up. I'm sucking on lozenges until I can try to sleep again.

In Other News...

So I've decided my neighborhood is very safe. I mean, it's in no danger of being overrun by bikers or criminals, because it's already *owned.* There is a skunk ruling this entire block--I've heard him (or her?) giving out the beats, I've seen him nibbling under the garbage skip, and I've twice almost walked into him at night (need to stop walking across the lawn in the dark.) It's comforting to know there's a tough customer like him, marching like a sentinel around my building.



* The skit has child-Bill-Cosby getting his tonsils out, and when the doctor examines him after and asks him to swallow KABOOM!!  It hurts like hell, and he refuses to do anymore swallowing.

ramblings of a fevered mind

Just got home from an overnight shift. I love overnights, if I'm not needed too much on the floor, because I get soooooo much done. We only have 2 computers and 7-8 managers, and only one office so it's like Grand Central Station with staff needing things, meetings, private meetings, interviews, training etc. An overnight, alone in the office... bliss.

One of the head honcho guys stayed quite awhile at the beginning, so I think most of the questions they had got settled that way. All the construction dudes (doing a remerch) needed was the occasional unlocked door.

[Flipping TV channels... why is the Soprano on at 9 AM?? I guess it would seem too boring to tempt a preschooler to watch. ...And a comedy about porn?]

I didn't know how productive I'd be cause my body was sooo aaaachy. But the meds kicked in, and I had one more dose at midnight. But by morning I was achy again and SORE THROAT. I felt bad I couldn't help the gift manager more with re-placing the product but blehhhhhh. It's the kind of day when you would have called in sick, except you couldn't. Same as last year--I got sick when I was in charge of the overnight inventory shift. I was blowing my nose every five minutes.

[Minion right now: "Herb bread with margarine? Herb bread! HERB BREAD!!]

And I forgot my nice soup lunch so I ate potato chips and pop from the vending machines.

Anyway. I had more meds at home, so I'm eating something healthier, and waiting for the drugs to beat the achytude. Then off to bed.

Stop sucking my finger!!! How am I going to do Nanowrimo with this evil cat in town? Might be the first year I'm beaten. Cause if anyone can beat the man, it's Evil Minion.