50 Questions

Q: What was your most recent trip of more than 50 miles?

A: Okay first of all I have no concept of that 50 miles is. Not because I'm Canadian, but because I'm dyscalculiac. I can picture one foot because I have feet. But I can't picture a mile or a kilometer. I'll do some research and be back.

...

Okay Mtl to Ottawa is 100 miles, and a 2 hour drive. So I guess it's on hour of driving.

A for real: Stratford, Ontario, last fall. For the Shakespeare festival, with Gilby, Oscar and Yoda.


Et vous?

I'm not on fire

Have you ever heard what the novelists call a blood-curdling scream? I tell you ... it really does curdleize the blood. Or at least, it sends a shot of adrenaline SHOOTING through you, and you can perform great feats of ingenuity, such as extracting a cat who's hiding under the bed.

A couple nights ago, at a time when most are asleep but we are not, the fire alarm went off. This happens about once a year. Once it was a cooking fire in someone's home, but the other times it was a prank or malfunction, we don't know which. So when it goes off, we don't freak out too much, but our #1 priority it to get the cats (now made easier.) Fernando goes out to see if it's Real Cause for Alarm, while I pack up the cat. (And if it seems fake, I toss my purse and laptop into my backpack.)

Tonight it went off again and we were debating whether to leave when we heard a woman scream. Oh. My. God. I guess she screamed "fire" but all I heard was



but without the giggling at the end, and a bit longer.

There was no fire as far as we can tell. Maybe she saw the fire trucks which Fernando had called (which he automatically does.) Or it was mischief. There is a form of socio-whatever-thingy that calls in fires and then watches people. Maybe the scream was added as an effect, because everyone was so blasé last time. But they were blasé this time too.

We have new neighbors upstairs (the boys have sadly moved out) and when they saw me in the staircase with my cat carrier the woman said: You're taking your cat?! So the boyfriend went back. But he didn't manage to corral them.

Thees will not happen to me. I will die trying to get my One Remaining Cat (and more if I get more) out of the apartment. If she hid behind a bookcase where I couldn't reach her, I'd pull the frikking thing down. I don't know all this for a fact, but the day they tried taking Sherry away to give him a needle without me being present I saw a side of me I've never seen. The Mommy Feelings seem to be alive and kicking, they've just transferred themselves to felines.

As it was, the night ended more pleasantly. Turns out the new neighbors were delivered my mail by accident, and it was my two remaining etsy packages (plus I got the other one in my box today.) So I'm sitting here enjoying them. Because I'm too bloody wired to sleep, though I start work in 5 hours and only slept 3 hours last night.

Oh my lord.

AHHHHHHHHHHHHH! <--Hey! Stop screaming in my head!! #%$^@%

Look at the cute packaging. I ordered two bracelets and they came wrapped like little prezzies, and she tossed in a third smaller bracelet for free, wrapped in a little bag with her bunny symbol.
Interestingly, that scream makes me realize what it would be like to be caught in a real fire. And I begin to think that Bruce Springsteen's song "I'm On Fire" is a poor metaphor. "I'm On a Slow Intense Heat" maybe, but that man is not on fire.