Ranting about Hancock

Just watched the movie Hancock: The first half was so good, that it made the second half all the more horrendously bad. Stop the movie after the bank heist scene.

The director said the original script read like Leaving Las Vegas--you can read a description here. They lifted it up a bit into more of a Redemption story, and the first half is well done. I was thinking: "Why were the reviews so bad? This movie is really touching."

Oh my days. There's a plot twist in the second half that obviously has nothing to do with the original movie, that is stupid, full of holes, and completely ruins it. The second half of the movie would have made for a nice mediocre superhero movie all on its own; but tagged onto the story of this lonely, alcoholic superhero... blehhhh.

I could go on and on, in detail, but I'll spare you.

Top Christmas Songs & Album Picks - Sale Edition

Alright, I'm going to give you some Christmas music recommendations. This post isn't that long, there's just a lot of videos in case you need to sample.

To save you money, this list is based on Canada iTunes current "Holiday Music Under $8.00". I looked in the US iTunes store and all they have is a measly list of 15 songs for 69 cents each, so I don't know in which countries this list will apply.

First, though, I found this treasure: 100 Classic Christmas Songs for $6.99. These aren't crappy covers--Bing Crosby, Bobby Darin, Doris Day, Eartha Kitt, Elvis, Gene Autrey etc. If you like 1950s Christmas songs then this is your quickest, cheapest way to build your library.

Now on to the iTunes sale...

(1) There are a lot of hits in the sale--I haven't included those in my review.

 

 

 

 

(2) There are some misses. This is just based on sampling the album on iTunes--albums that sounded unoriginal or soulless. I didn't bother sampling The Usual Suspects like Kenny G.

 

 

(3) One Hit Wonders:

Unless you're a fan of Glee, the only thing worth buying from these fine purveyors of The Whitest Music On the Planet is their "12 Days of Christmas" hit.

 

Mariah's first Christmas album doesn't sound bad, but it's just run of the mill gospel Christmas music--you're better off finding a Mahalia Jackson recording. 

 

However her "All I Want for Christmas is You" is a well known Guilty Pleasure, even for Jack Black: "This is embarrassing to admit but I kinda like this one by the girl who's a little crazy but sings a lot of notes — "All I want for Christmas is youuuu!" --- There's some good melody lines in there. Oh my god, I just lost the last few indie-cred rockers that were in my camp."

(4) Pick and Choose:

Unless you only like acoustic-rock style Christmas music, I wouldn't (and didn't) buy these entire albums. Just cherry pick.

* Bruce Cockburn: "Riu Riu Chiu," "I Saw Three Ships," "Les Anges dans nos campagnes," and "Mary Had a Baby."

* Melissa Etheridge: They're a bit of a downer, but still good -- "Ring the Bells," and a Jimi-Hendrix-esque "O Night Divine."

* Indigo Girls: A bluegrass "O Holy Night" that brings out its demanding side (Fall on your knees or else!), a touching "There's Still My Joy," and a couple originals--a jolly number called "Your Holiday Song" and a quieter "Mistletoe."

(5) Worth the plunge (but at sale prices!)

Jazzy Pick: Harry Connick Jr

I like Harry's style of jazz--1930s New Orleans, but always with his personal stamp. There's some funky dance numbers, boppy instrumentals (think Harry Met Sally soundtrack), and a cool cover of fellow New Orleanian Louis Armstrong's "Zat You Santa Claus?"

Santariffic--a song about the sexiness of Santa. (I believe this style of trombone playing is what, in the 1910s, they called "dirty!")

Classic Pick: Faith Hill

I bought a few songs from this in 2008, but bought the rest this year. A lot of artists go for a classy-classic sound, but it just ends up tinny, or emotionless, or trite. Faith Hill's album sounds simple and reverent and just pretty. It's the one to doze off by the fireside to. Oh--it also has a lovely original song "A Baby Changes Everything."

 

(I think it would be fun to sing backup on Little Drummer Boy, don't you? This choir is awesome.) This is a perfect example of what makes this album great. It starts soft, 2 minutes in it amps up, and then just before you're expecting a wailing-over-the-top-hit-every-note ending, she takes it right back down. Just as you should if singing to a baby.

Now here's a type of songcraft I like--where you take one line, repeat it throughout, and it gradually changes in meaning. And I imagine it mirrors what it really is like to have a baby--scary, hard work, your whole life changes, but also--your whole life changes!

Christmas BD Pick: Sting

BD = Before Dickens. Christmas songs that sound older than A Victorian Christmas. Sometimes he sings so slowly it sounds like someone's playing with the speed on the record--but besides this drawback, it's a dark, interesting Christmas album for your inner pagan. (This is another one that I bought a couple songs from last year, then completed this year.)

Cherry Tree Carol - This is the coolest of all Christmas songs. It's about Joseph giving Mary the shames for getting preggers by another man, and she in turn gives him the beats! Take that old man!

When Joseph was an old man, an old man was he,
He courted Virgin Mary, the Queen of Galilee.

When Joseph and Mary were walking one day,
Here is apples and cherries so fair to behold.

Then Mary spoke to Joseph so meek and so mild:
"Joseph, gather me some cherries, for I am with child."

Then Joseph flew in anger, in anger he flew:
"O let the father of the baby gather cherries for you."

Well, the cherry-tree bowed low down, bowed down to the ground,
And Mary gathered cherries while Joseph stood down.

Then Joseph took Mary all on his right knee,
Crying, "Lord, have mercy for what I have done."

When Joseph was an old man, an old man was he,
He courted Virgin Mary, the Queen of Galilee.

Pop Pick: The Hotel Café Presents Winter Songs - various artists

I take it the Hotel Café started a coffee shop known for female singer-songwriter types, so this album definitely requires you to be in touch with your Feminine Side. But you'll be glad you did. There are few throw-out songs from this, except maybe Katy Perry's dull "White Christmas." There's nice covers, nice originals, and my fave: "Winter Song"  - Sara Bareilles & Ingrid Michealson doing what they do best, being Fragile and Romantic. Also noteworthy, Lenka's "All My Bells Are Ringing"--good for those who are enjoying the current '60s throwback trend.

Some for Everyone Pick: Sugarland

And yet another album that I partially bought last year, and enjoyed enough to complete this year. The covers on this album or only okay, except for the best "O Come Emanuel" you're likely to hear. But it's full of good original songs: a retrospective of Christmases past, through the lens of the "Little Wood Guitar" she once received; a bluesy "yes mother I'm coming home"; a love song "Maybe Baby"; and finally a beautiful Christmas ode to pretty winter nights: "City of Silver Lights." There's a little of everything on this album... unless you hate country music.