not a fairy tale!

Lord what am I going to do about all this sleeping! I took my sleepy-headache pills at 11 PM last night, but I still slept from 4 AM to 2 PM - ten hours. And ever since taking these pills I sleep so deep that I have really vivid, clear dreams, and remember them better than I used to... which is kind of disturbing. It's like living a second life. Well... I'll try taking the pills even earlier tonight, see what happens.

Academia is a scary place

I love how you can be doing a search of academic articles, and come up with both these titles, side by side:

16.	Native Lithuanian Musical Instruments Juozas Žilevičius; Valentine Matelis Stable URL: http://links.jstor.org/sici?sici=0027-4631%28193501%2921%3A1%3C99%3ANLMI%3E2.0.CO%3B2-C NOTE: This article contains high-quality images. Article Information | Page of First Match | Print | Download | Save Citation
17.	Killing the Police: Myths and Motives Mona Margarita Stable URL: http://links.jstor.org/sici?sici=0002-7162%28198011%29452%3C63%3AKTPMAM%3E2.0.CO%3B2-P Article Information | Page of First Match | Print | Download | Save Citation

heads and rooms

Okay. I cleaned my room.

Today I had to make the 2 hour trek to my headache doctor (and made my next appt in May when school is OVER.) While my headache's have absolutely gotten better, she wants them down to the point of only a few times per month--I still have low grade headaches almost every day (though for me this is much much better than before.) So now I'm being pumped up to 50mg of my drug. Great... instead of sleeping 10 hours a night I'll sleep for 15.

Despair

I write really awkwardly about stats. I just dared re-read some of my stats paper, and it doesn't even sound like me. Lord this thing needs to be re-written.

...
...
...

I'm gonna go clean my room.

"Lasciate ogne speranza, voi ch'intrate"

" Midway upon the journey of our life
I found myself within a forest dark,
For the straightforward pathway had been lost.
Ah me! how hard a thing it is to say
What was this forest savage, rough, and stern"

Sigh. I'm having trouble working on my MA Essay. I've had a cold all week, and though I sleeps and sleeps and sleeps... still the cold... still the no energy. I can't even use the usual procrastination technique of cooking, cause -- the no energy.

It's not helping that I've been doing homework in bed all year. Possibly it is time to relaunch the desk. I just haven't been in a desk mood. I don't like my desk.

And also not helping, that I can't find the kind of information I need for my paper. All the other things I have to do to improve and expand it are pretty straight forward, but for this one I'm digging... digging... and not turning up much. Meh! Meh meh meh! But I have to get work done on this now, before conferences start--otherwise the time I'm spending at home, not taking on extra shifts, no TA money yet, will be like totally wasted.

Oh well. Hopefully the colditude will have passed by tomorrow. And hopefully I'll strike oil on this seemingly hopeless googling.

"All hope abandon, ye who enter in!"

Back on the Nets!

First day back to school and I'm getting a sickitude! But just a cold, no biggie. Actually, to save hours for the grading my prof's not requiring we attend class, so I can sit at home and work on my MA essay until Jan 28. Then the 6 conferences begin! (I'm doing a half-TAship extra, to make a little extra dough.) Well, unless there is enough time in my contract to attend some classes and grade--I guess she'll let me know once it's calculated.

Anyway. So I am only just catching up on my internetahj--updated my Christmas photos to facebook. But look at this old pic I found on my other computer-->I tell you, once Christmas gets into your clothes, there's no getting it out!


I remember those ornaments. I miss them.

Anyway. I gotta go sleep off the coldy, but first I want to post my Christmas supper-ahj recipes to my foodie blog. I really enjoyed making it--I cooked through about 4 movies (I have a mini TV in my kitchen.) I like cooking alone, at a slow pace, relaxed, one thing at a time, washing as I go... I think I watched... old Pride and Prejudice... State and Main... Christmas Carol... and oh ya The Belles of St Trinian's. I eventually had to put on running shoes cause my feet were so sore from standing.

We didn't have a sit-down supper, though--we just ate a new course whenever we felt moved to do so. We were so relaxed about the Christmas planning, that it ended up Perfect. The food (and H's apple cider) all worked out, we all sort of rolled out of bed and sluffed down to Paul's at the same time, and we had lots of conversation and laughs, none of the sibling combos fought (or husband and wife combo) etc. Anyway, all is narrated on facebook in my photo album.

He was tabbylicious

So my school work is done, I just have grading to do. I'd be feeling pretty good except that Paul's cat, Monsieur Willy, had to be put down today. SHNIFF.

He'd been off his food this past month, though still strutting around yelling. We babysit him a couple weeks ago, and he was okay. But today Paul found, just before going to work, that Willy was acting different. He asked us to check on him--Fernando went over, and was concerned that Willy seemed to be in pain. He thought it best to take him to the vet.

Myriam's in town, so her mother drove them all down to the emergency vet in the evening. And the long and short is that they, in conference with me on the phone, and later Paul on the phone, decided it was probably best to put him to sleep. (Me balling away on the phone while trying to get out my opinion to F.) At least I got to give him some last pets before he left--I had a feeling this was how it would go. He's an old cat, and he just had that Death's Door look about him.

Even if he'd had something semi treatable (the vet thinks he was diabetic, and maybe other problems, so it wouldn't have been a simple treatment) he still would have had to be kept at the vet's for a couple days, to have an IV to rehydrate. I thought that would just be too awful for him. Cats HATE being away from home. How terrible to put him through trauma, only to have to bring him in again in a couple months, and still put him down. Instead, we figured, he's only been feeling sick a short while, he hasn't reached the stage where he's totally unresponsive to everyone (it's really sad to see an animal get to that point), he was sitting calmly on his velvet blanket with F and M petting him... it seemed like this would be the best way to go. Even for a human, non?

Oh la. Poor Fernando. He just LOVED that cat. Willy was one of the nicest cats I have ever met. So calm, so sweet, so friendly. We would have loved to take him, but... that would have set off the Meowee East again.

Even so, when F brought back our cage with the blankie, I wasn't thinking and set it down on a chair, and Sherry took ONE sniff and... FIVE ALARM FIRE!

Hiss! Hiss! Growl! Moan!

Haley of course gave as good as she got. I isolated her before she got really offended. Then locked up Nombly, while Sherry hid behind a bin hissing. I threw some niblets at him, and left him alone til he was ready to emerge.

And now, all night, he's totally accepting of Haley but he thinks Nombly is a new cat (just like whenever we bring N home from the vet.) I don't know if it's because Haley made it pretty clear that she was still she (HISS YOURSELF ASSHOLE! -- Oh, ya, that's Haley alright) or if it's because N looks like Willy, and Sherry knows Willy's smell. Or option C., Sherry's just a big dumb jock... which is the most likely reason.

Whenever Sherry hisses at N, Haley doesn't even get threatened (as one would expect), she just looks startled. "Dude... are you kidding me? Even I know Nombly, and I haven't lived with him ten years."

All this to say... taking Willy in would have meant another year of Meowee East negotiations.

Oh la. Anyway... poor Silly Willy. I'm going to miss that damn cat.