Nano-nano

I signed up for National Novel Writing Month again (50 000 words in November.) I realized that Fernando will be at his sister's for part of the time, so there isn't too much risk of divorce. It will be a good way to jolt my next novel into existence. My only goal is the first 50 000 words of a rough draft --> get some new ideas going --> establish the tone, etc.

My profile.

One of my fave songs when I was a kid

Terry Gibbs "Somebody's Knockin'"

awesome-o

most amusing thing on the internets today

Scott Baio did perpetrated some Foolishness on the tweets this week. Including threatening to sue someone because she unfollowed him.

Scott Baio's Righty Rant -- What do you get when you combine a washed up child star and unimpeded access to a computer keyboard? Apparently, in the case of Scott Baio -- one-time "Happy Days" and "Charles in Charge" heartthrob -- the result is a stream of vitriolic statements about "liberals" and a flame war with some random person.

Baio, an admitted conservative, posted a series of now-deleted statements that got a few folks riled. A sampling:

"Someone said that the best thing about the cash for clunkers is, now most of the obama stickers are GONE!!!!! YES YES YES!!!!!!!"

Then, in response to a protest that Obama is "still our pres," Baio replied:

"yeah and Michael Vick still plays football. What's ur point? They both are losers."

Baio defended himself later in an interview with Glen Beck. And despite an assertion that he can roll with the punches ("it's the kind of game I'm in"), Baio has since converted his Twitter page to an approved access-only account. (from the Washington Post)

So the site Dear Author has started calling him a chachbag, and trying to get his name associated on Google with the term.

I really must incorporate this word into my vocab.

shit his dad says

shitmydadsays "Just pay the parking ticket. Don't be so outraged. You're not a freedom fighter in the civil rights movement. You double parked."

First Aid Mabel

I did a two-day First Aid course recently, for my work. I'm really glad because for years I've worried about something happening at work, or in my life, and my inability to cope with it. But I also had, like, First Aid Performance Anxiety. That taking First Aid class would somehow be like gym class and I'd be bad at it!

But all went well. It was very interesting, and though I won't remember everything if ever in a Panic, I at least feel a bit more confident. I have actual Heimlich and CPR technique, rather than guesswork. I even know how to use these little portable defibrillators which some places own. The machine speaks instructions to you. Very cool.

As usual, I got past my Perf Anx by usually volunteering for things first. But we were usually doing stuff as more than one person at a time, so it's not like all eyes were on us. I had to...

- Demonstrate that I knew how to approach someone laying on the floor, to find out what state they're in. And then put them in the recovery position if they were unconscious still breathing. (That's the posish my vet put Nombly in after giving him The Fatal Dose! Only the cat version.) I practiced this at home with my stuffed dog. "PUPPY! [clap my hands loud] PUPPY CAN YOU HEAR ME? PUPPY!!"

- Demonstrate that I could two types of bandagings. I did cut across hand, and cut on arm.

- Demonstrate that I could do CPR.

- Demonstrate I could use the defib.

- Play a person with a crustacean allergy, and my group had to figure out what I had by asking me questions. Weren't they surprised when they asked "Do you have an epipen with you?" and I whipped one out of my pocket! (which the teacher had given me) Now my coworkers (I was in training with 2 of them) think I should carry an epipen at all times, just for drama.


Did you know...

- Anyone can buy an epipen? You get it at the pharmacist's counter. This might be handy for any time I need a sudden shot of adrenaline.

- When you give CPR you're supposed to push the chest down at a rate of 100 pushes in 1 minute, which is about the same beat as "Staying Alive" or "Another One Bites the Dust."

I couldn't sing the lyrics to myself while counting out the 30 pushes, so I discovered the easiest thing was to sing the "ah ah ah ah staying alive staying alive" part over and over. "1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8" "9 10 11 12 13 14 15 16" "17 18 19 20 21 22 23 24".

* Part of the routine with CPR (and most emergencies) is that you assign jobs to people. You tell one to call 911, another to wait for the EMTs and show them where you are, and another to get the First Aid kit/mask/defib. But my coworkers and I added a fourth job...

Mabel (kneeling next to unconscious nonbreather):

- Joe! Go call 911!
- Mary! Go get the First Aid kit!
- Bob! Go wait for the ambulance!
- Sally! Start singing "Staying Alive"!

I told this to a staff member today, and she said she'd be so freaked out she would just start singing without question. And of course, it could just devolve into this. [Full version here.]

We also thought you could just put the songs on a playlist labeled "1" on your ipod, and ask someone to get it for you.

***

A research study at the University of Illinois suggests that people were more effective at Cardiopulmonary Resuscitation (CPR) if they were listening to the Bee Gees 'Staying Alive' while performing it. The reason is apparently that the song's tempo, 103 beats per minute, is close to the optimum number of 100 compressions per minute to help jump start a heart during a cardiac arrest.

I don't mind this song, but if you're working in the health service it might be an idea to get a bit of variety and check out other tracks with a similar tempo. DJ BPM Studio - which specialises in just this kind of thing - has a whole list of 100 BPM tracks including Madonna 'La Isla Bonita' and Bjork 'Isobel'; pretty close too is Lily Allen 'LDN' (100.01 BPM), Pink 'Stupid Girl' (100.02), ABBA 'Dancing Queen' (100.47), The Clash 'Hitsville UK' (100.69) and Blondie 'In the Flesh' (100.8). [source]

Navel Gazing: The Books That Changed My Life - accidental finding

My Traitor's Heart - Rian Malan

A book that someone lent me, and that I finally read because I'd had the book too long and had to give it back. I'd never really asked for it, and I don't know why this guy at church liked it or thought I'd like it, but man... WHAT a book. Sometimes there are ideas in life that you're taught, but you don't really internalize them, or envision what they really mean. This is one of those books that took some *nice ideas* and showed how powerful they can really be. And at another level, it's just a great book at showing how Complicated Life Is to understand--that you can't take a country's history and politics, submit them to a little analysis, and set down a bunch of easy conclusions. History is FUBAR.

It's an autobiographical story of a guy who was supposed to write a history of South Africa, but found he couldn't do it without writing about his personal struggle as a Guilty White Liberal growing up in the 70s, and a crime reporter in the extremely repressive and violent 80s. This book just blew me away. Malan tells you a story and you believe one thing--then peels away another layer for you, shaking the thing you've just come to believe. And on and on he peels away the layers, until you feel as messed up and confused as he does.

And then at the end of the book he tells this Disney like story about a Nice White Couple who go off into a poor community and revive it... and then it all unravels, he's killed, and she loses everything. But after a long struggle she commits to staying out there anyway, because she decides that you can't just love people when they love you back. You have to love them, even if they hate you.

I would have to say that story definitely became foundational to my core values.